Thursday, September 2, 2010
Inappropriate?
This little video highlights a moment of what I would say is inappropriate behavior at a funeral. Although we are not at the funeral yet, today was more of a greeting day/wait for everyone to arrive/drink lots of wine and compete for talking over eachother. At one point, Grandma's dog who looked so sad, needed taking out and unfortunatley she couldn't quite finish the task. After wipies in the driveway didn't work, and inspection in the kitchen amongst relatives eating but who didn't see to really notice the situation going on before them, the dog was taken into the bathroom for a bath. This video stars my Mom and Sister-in-law with Sassy the dog. My other sister in law and I, are the gigglers behind the scenes. We were observing the hilarity of the situation in the middle of what could be a sad event. Perfect time to give the dog a bath.
I'm now intrigued by what tomorrow, when emotions are high, might bring.... Stay tuned.
Inappropriatley behaving at a funeral, how are you?
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Prepared
We also have very few pieces of actual luggage and it's put away somewhere, so this is yet another trip where we are using my favorite laundry baskets! Reneck laundry luggage strikes again! (see previous post)
At least we will be PREPARED in case of an emergency relocation! How are You?
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Got Etiquette?
Can you imagine, sitting at home and thinking –“I wonder how I am supposed to act at Uncle Larry’s funeral tomorrow?”….. Maybe someone could give me a few pointers. I think I’ll take a look at the internet, because all advice on the internet is true and right. (The following tips come from a REAL website – they cover lots of topics from A to Z! literally….)
Rule 1: Don’t be silent; be sure to at least say something. (GREAT, I knew being a Chatty Cathy was the way to go! – I am going to make a list on the eight hour drive in, of things to talk about so I am not silent. I am quite sure bringing up all my medical ailments would be a good starting point- there is bound to be some people there that can relate and offer advice!)
Rule 2: Don’t upset the family by being ignorant or clumsy. (I’ll be sure NOT to trip and fall into the open casket and I will not ask when the party starts! – these tips are amazing!)
Rule 3: Visit the grieving family immediately. (Excellent news. Half of my family is all ready descending, I’ll bring up the rear by being fashionably late)
Rule 4: 15 minutes is a good length of time to express your Sympathy. (Eight hour car ride, perfect for me to write down what I plan to say, rehearse and have my husband time it’s length – OMG, 15 minutes!!)
Rule 5: Take over the tea making from those stricken with grief. ( Now, we are talking- Don’t be clumsy, chit chat and make the tea – an excellent mix of duties for a novice)
Rule 6: Just be there for the warm embraces and kisses if the grieving family member needs that. (OK, some of my family members are attractive, but honestly, I’m not going to be a kissing and hug dummy without some kind of payment.)
Rule 7: Sometimes words are not necessary, just be there. (Now we’re talking – or NOT, I can stand there and plan my outfits for the rest of the week in my head , and then we can awkwardly look at each other in silence)
Rule 8: A closed funeral is not open to the public, however it would be appropriate to call or email. (That is the kind of harassment I’m in favor of anyway – anonymous)
Rule 9: Before bringing food to the family, check first to see what others are bringing. (Hey, uh, Joe, I was wondering, what kind of food you got going on over there? You got some pasta, pastries? Great… Well I got some day old donuts here and I think I’ll bring them on over, if you don’t think anyone else is bringing that?)
Rule 10: Take a scarf with you in case it is a custom to cover your head. (Done! I plan on having a bad hair day anyway.)
Rule 11: Do not send a wreath to the family’s home. (CRAP! – Do you think it is too late to call UPS? I thought the wreath would look nice on their front door….)
Rule 12: Placing flowers on the casket is reserved for family members. (Earl, keep the Daisies in your pocket)
Rule 13: When sending flowers, be sure to send them in a self-contained water vessel, as family members will not want to be tied down to such mundane tasks. (Joe! Got another box of long-stemmed roses, here – we’re outta vases – grab something to put them in, NOT THAT!!!)
Rule 14: Stick with pastel colored flowers. ( Wasn’t Buddy’s funeral pretty? He always looked good in pink……)
Rule 15: One should not refuse to be a pallbearer except in the case of illness or absence. (Sure, I’ll be a pallbearer – I didn’t think it meant I had to show up!!!!)
Rule 16: Bad behavior from children would be in poor taste. (Just at funerals though, right?? – I wonder what they think of openly beating the children into good behavior?)
Rule 17: Tell children the body is only a vehicle. (Good advice. I’m hoping they don’t bring pennies)
Rule 18: Tell children if they want, they may touch the body. (Now come on!! I cannot fit a wipie container in my funeral purse!)
Rule 19: Tell children what is left after cremation looks like ashes from a fire. (Excellent, my kids are going to love this little explanation. And when we get home, do you guys want to have a camp-out and cook S’mores?)
Rule 20: Encourage, Explain, but never Force (Still speaking of the children, I take it. Darn it, I’m going to have to be on my best behavior!)
Well I’m all set now. Got my rules. Feeling pretty well-etiquette-ed, and you?
Monday, August 30, 2010
Goodbye Con't (Blogger not cooperating today)
Today, my Grandma Vera passed away. She lived a great 90 years and I am happy that she did not suffer. She had five children with one set of twins, was an amazing artist (mostly oil paintings) and a woman of excellent taste. We always called her Grandma Vera – which sounds a little strict, doesn’t it? Well, she was the Grandma that taught me that manners were of upmost importance. She was a strong believer in strength and putting on a brave face and I have to say I like that in a woman. I never saw her emotional. She was one tough cookie. In the summers my parents would send me to Chicago for two weeks. One week was spent with my Mom’s parents (see previous posts about Nannie and Poppies) and one week with Grandma Vera and Grandpa. (My Dad’s parents) Two VERY different experiences. I saved the good clothes for Vera’s if you know what I mean. Let me preface this all by saying, I loved her. She was a GREAT lady and some of my greatest strengths come from her. As with all people you encounter, there are always humorous moments so now, I will share:
We used to spend Thanksgivings going to Grandma Vera’s (this is just always how we referred to this side of the family –she was the matriarch) About a month prior to going, was spent shopping for perfect clothes – the kind of clothes we would never wear anywhere else as kids. Hair was cut, shoes were new, and manners were in check. My Mom would spend weeks anguishing about the trip and lecturing. As kids, we just enjoyed the chaos. Going to my grandparent’s house was an adventure. Their home was beautiful and classy. We saw things there we would never have seen otherwise. My Grandfather always drove a Cadillac. He reminded you of a Don of the Mafia and I often wondered if there were ever any ties…. They belonged to a country club where we swam during the day and dined at night. I loved going to the ladies room and seeing a real live attendant! I can recall every detail about their home with the laundry chutes we could fit into on every floor, the little mail slot in the front hall closet, the real bar with sink in the walk-out basement with a full kitchen where meals were cooked, the refrigerator that blended in with all the other kitchen cabinets, the mini containers of Hagen Daz ice cream in the freezer, the Schnauzer’s they had, the furs in the closet, and the vintage Barbie dolls that were kept in the bedroom that was through another bedroom like it was a secret. So many wonderful memories that I will cherish forever. As the years have gone by and my Mom is no longer responsible for how we are dressed, I see now the stress she was under to have us all looking perfect.
Guess where my husband is right now? At the store with our son getting new pants, shoes and shirt that are appropriate for this kind of funeral. I am tearing my closet apart. We really do not have the money to pull this off and to head to Chicago, but off we go, to mix in with the others, make it seem like we mature and ready for this adult stuff. Behind the scenes, you would be privy to swearing, threatening, begging, pleading and well all kinds of inappropriate behavior.
We will be seeing a lot of family that is now spread out all over the US that we haven’t seen in years. There will be arguing, fighting, crying, meddling, pettiness, love, hugs (OH NO, I’m NOT a hugger….) lipsticky kisses, memories, showing off, oh, just good times. Times that would make a great movie on the big screen, because some of these characters couldn’t be played any better by an actor or actress.
I can’t wait to bring back the stories I am sure I will have. Little memories as funny, sad or truly hilarious as they are bound to be, I will cherish forever.
I promise not to curse the kids and lecture, I’m going to try to be laid back and CLASSY – might not be easy, kind of already stressing about the state of our shoes, the fact that I could really use a haircut, pedicure, eyebrows done, nails done, whole new wardrobe, new car, - Oh Geez, it’s starting already.
I’ll try to post each day, but If I miss, just remember where I am and think good thoughts for me and know that I will have stories, oh will I have stories….
We actually saw Grandma Vera in April after having gone over 5 years without seeing her. We helped celebrate her 90th birthday and do you know what we did? We went to a high-end Bocce Ball center and she played – she was a member of a Bocce Ball and Ironing team for many many years. She out played all of us too. Of course now I am doing an inventory of what did we wear then and making sure we aren’t bringing any of the same things this time – ok, so now I need a new purse, a different outfit (I’m wearing my go-to shoes -see post about Coach shoes) I wonder if we have time to get the car detailed – yes, I know I have gone too far…. When were funerals ever about the person who passed? You know they are about everyone there – and this is not a bad thing, it’s why I love people – always have, always will – all their funny and irritating quirks and all.
We used to spend Thanksgivings going to Grandma Vera’s (this is just always how we referred to this side of the family –she was the matriarch) About a month prior to going, was spent shopping for perfect clothes – the kind of clothes we would never wear anywhere else as kids. Hair was cut, shoes were new, and manners were in check. My Mom would spend weeks anguishing about the trip and lecturing. As kids, we just enjoyed the chaos. Going to my grandparent’s house was an adventure. Their home was beautiful and classy. We saw things there we would never have seen otherwise. My Grandfather always drove a Cadillac. He reminded you of a Don of the Mafia and I often wondered if there were ever any ties…. They belonged to a country club where we swam during the day and dined at night. I loved going to the ladies room and seeing a real live attendant! I can recall every detail about their home with the laundry chutes we could fit into on every floor, the little mail slot in the front hall closet, the real bar with sink in the walk-out basement with a full kitchen where meals were cooked, the refrigerator that blended in with all the other kitchen cabinets, the mini containers of Hagen Daz ice cream in the freezer, the Schnauzer’s they had, the furs in the closet, and the vintage Barbie dolls that were kept in the bedroom that was through another bedroom like it was a secret. So many wonderful memories that I will cherish forever. As the years have gone by and my Mom is no longer responsible for how we are dressed, I see now the stress she was under to have us all looking perfect.
Guess where my husband is right now? At the store with our son getting new pants, shoes and shirt that are appropriate for this kind of funeral. I am tearing my closet apart. We really do not have the money to pull this off and to head to Chicago, but off we go, to mix in with the others, make it seem like we mature and ready for this adult stuff. Behind the scenes, you would be privy to swearing, threatening, begging, pleading and well all kinds of inappropriate behavior.
We will be seeing a lot of family that is now spread out all over the US that we haven’t seen in years. There will be arguing, fighting, crying, meddling, pettiness, love, hugs (OH NO, I’m NOT a hugger….) lipsticky kisses, memories, showing off, oh, just good times. Times that would make a great movie on the big screen, because some of these characters couldn’t be played any better by an actor or actress.
I can’t wait to bring back the stories I am sure I will have. Little memories as funny, sad or truly hilarious as they are bound to be, I will cherish forever.
I promise not to curse the kids and lecture, I’m going to try to be laid back and CLASSY – might not be easy, kind of already stressing about the state of our shoes, the fact that I could really use a haircut, pedicure, eyebrows done, nails done, whole new wardrobe, new car, - Oh Geez, it’s starting already.
I’ll try to post each day, but If I miss, just remember where I am and think good thoughts for me and know that I will have stories, oh will I have stories….
We actually saw Grandma Vera in April after having gone over 5 years without seeing her. We helped celebrate her 90th birthday and do you know what we did? We went to a high-end Bocce Ball center and she played – she was a member of a Bocce Ball and Ironing team for many many years. She out played all of us too. Of course now I am doing an inventory of what did we wear then and making sure we aren’t bringing any of the same things this time – ok, so now I need a new purse, a different outfit (I’m wearing my go-to shoes -see post about Coach shoes) I wonder if we have time to get the car detailed – yes, I know I have gone too far…. When were funerals ever about the person who passed? You know they are about everyone there – and this is not a bad thing, it’s why I love people – always have, always will – all their funny and irritating quirks and all.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Like Bikes?
So, you know how when you hit next blog up at top of Blogger? I do this every day until I come across a blog that interests me in hopes that this is how my blog will be discovered. Well, the problem is that I am stuck in the middle of blogs all about Bikes. Not the vintage motocycle bikes that I like, actual propelled by the power of your own legs kind.
Here is my experience with bikes:
We moved out of the suburbs with sidewalks to the midde of nowhere when I was five and just learning how to ride a bke. Our road was dirt with lots of pot holes, and our driveway was gravel. We lived on the backside of the 13th hole of a golf course, so occassionally I could take my bike over to one of the cart paths and ride it. (this was how I learned to rollerskate too)
Where we lived there was an abundane of V-flies. If you do not know what these are or are lucky enough to not have experienced them, they are like flying piranah. One day my Mom, probably feeling bad that we coudn't ride our bikes anywhere decided we should all go on a bike adventure. (She most likely had not been on a bike in about 15 years - like me now.) We set off, she is leading the pack, and the V-flies start swarming her. She is not an avid bike rider so in order to keep her hands on the handle bars she begins to whip her head and hair around. The next thing I know, she has gone off the road down a ravine and landed in a ditch with V-flies all over her and plenty of scrapes and bruises. I was scarred for life. I am sure it was much worse for me, seeing her down there than it was for her...
For awhile, my boyfriend got into mountain bike racing. This was kind of like the old days of going to boat shows and boat yards, except now we were travelling into remote areas of Michigan to watch races, sit in the car, get splashed with mud, eat lots of granola, look at birkensocks- ugh, and sit in the car.
I took a spin class - I cheated. Riding bikes for long periods of time makes your butt look bigger - no thanks.
None of my kids would learn to ride their bikes the easy way. Every single one of the stubborn things chose the opportunity of me washing dishes to sneak outside, get on their bike and pedal away. Perfectly. After I had spent hours angushing that they would be the only kid who couldn't ride a bike.
So needless to say, I haven't had a great relationship with bikes and I have been wondering what is the underlying meaning of bike blogs surrounding mine? So, if you are a random bike enthusiast and you happen across my blog, here are some pics of bikes I might like......
And there you have it. I might ride one of these.... Not riding today, How are You?
Here is my experience with bikes:
We moved out of the suburbs with sidewalks to the midde of nowhere when I was five and just learning how to ride a bke. Our road was dirt with lots of pot holes, and our driveway was gravel. We lived on the backside of the 13th hole of a golf course, so occassionally I could take my bike over to one of the cart paths and ride it. (this was how I learned to rollerskate too)
Where we lived there was an abundane of V-flies. If you do not know what these are or are lucky enough to not have experienced them, they are like flying piranah. One day my Mom, probably feeling bad that we coudn't ride our bikes anywhere decided we should all go on a bike adventure. (She most likely had not been on a bike in about 15 years - like me now.) We set off, she is leading the pack, and the V-flies start swarming her. She is not an avid bike rider so in order to keep her hands on the handle bars she begins to whip her head and hair around. The next thing I know, she has gone off the road down a ravine and landed in a ditch with V-flies all over her and plenty of scrapes and bruises. I was scarred for life. I am sure it was much worse for me, seeing her down there than it was for her...
For awhile, my boyfriend got into mountain bike racing. This was kind of like the old days of going to boat shows and boat yards, except now we were travelling into remote areas of Michigan to watch races, sit in the car, get splashed with mud, eat lots of granola, look at birkensocks- ugh, and sit in the car.
I took a spin class - I cheated. Riding bikes for long periods of time makes your butt look bigger - no thanks.
None of my kids would learn to ride their bikes the easy way. Every single one of the stubborn things chose the opportunity of me washing dishes to sneak outside, get on their bike and pedal away. Perfectly. After I had spent hours angushing that they would be the only kid who couldn't ride a bike.
So needless to say, I haven't had a great relationship with bikes and I have been wondering what is the underlying meaning of bike blogs surrounding mine? So, if you are a random bike enthusiast and you happen across my blog, here are some pics of bikes I might like......
Saturday, August 28, 2010
A little early
Today was one of those perfect last days of summer. The sounds outside from the crickets, birds, bugs, frogs, cicadas, it's like an orchestrated performance! I'm a little early, I know, but I just can't wait and now with the long weekend next week, I can relax - here is just a little somethin, somethin I accomplished.
Don't worry - I haven't lost my mind yet. I realize it is only August 28th, I just want to enjoy the season, so while cleaning the house, I got a few things out. I'm sure I have confused the kids - they'll be expecting Trick or Treating any day now...
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