Fine, How are You?: 12 Drummers and I'm DONE!

Dear True Love – (Your letter 12 of 12) FINALLY!!!

I will not miss writing to you. But I am glad I got your horrible gift giving off my chest and you for that matter. I am so very glad you were able to rid yourself of some feathered friends and interesting characters. REALLY glad about that.

In response to the final gift from you -

THE ROCK AND ROLL HALL OF FAME WAS SOLD OUT once these guys showed up! ( I re-directed them after they did what they must have been paid to do) I have to admit, this gift was at least entertaining.

Animal

Travis

I have received a lovely letter from my Turkish delivery guy – He said that he would have loved to have an affair with me, and missed me this week, however, he admitted that he couldn’t keep up with the gift giving of my previous lover and wished me luck in life.

After a few of the drummers consoled me, I told them where they could meet some lovely ladies and men if they were so inclined, and they hitched a bus to the concert hall. Now I am just left with a lot of bird poop and feathers. Most of the birds have fled the neighborhood. I wasn’t sure if the eggs splattered on my house were from angry neighbors or jealous hens.

Neil

Either way, I am glad to be rid of you. I am glad this is my last letter. I hear you wrote a song about your amazing gift giving and sold it for quite a pretty penny – and yes, I have heard it once or twice. I am pretty sure you owe me some kind of royalty –I was after all the inspiration.

You and your horrible gift giving are thankfully no longer mine–

-K