Hello Summer = Hello Stranger

Summer is in full swing here -

I
We survived vacation. We had the best time enjoying my parents, his sister's family and his Mom. Isn't it nice when family moves to vacation destinations to LIVE??  So very thoughtful of them!
 (Hey, while going to Amish-ville Ohio may not sound overly appealing, I did my part.... kind of)

We did: Fireworks in a rainstorm, I fell in a hole, drove 2800 miles from Ohio to the Gulf to Miami to Ohio, made a quick stop to the free part of Disney and managed to spend $70 on lunch, saw the movie Brave with the only other family dumb enough to sit in an empty theater in the seats directly behind us with a fussy baby and every kind of packaged snack imaginable, swam, played cards, laughed, discovered that our real best friends really are family.

We saw: Lots of Alligators, Pelicans, Dolphin, the inter-coastal up close and personal, the beach, Savannah at night, The Everglades -up close and personal, and so much more.

While we were gone, we celebrated our one year anniversary of being home-owners. I find it hard to believe that one year ago instead of being on vacation we were in moving HELL. In this past year we have  managed to fill the house up with lots of things we love in our vintage-y style and yet we have also managed to not ever get around to painting the trim inside. (Sounds like a fun time for a winter day....)

Our next project is getting rid of the loft bed for my youngest (who just celebrated her 10th Birthday) I am so excited to not have to make that bed ever again.  It made me cry and sweat on the coolest of days.  She hasn't slept in it since the weather turned warm.......

The hubby is in the garage painting a Craig's List find for her new room - A desk.  The loft has a desk built in so when we move in the single bed we had to replace the desk.

After that of course I have lots of other plans -

See the chimney on the side? I would like to keep it of course, but build a nice porch off the side of the house with the window on the left a door way like.....



or this one:  


or like this one and use the chimney:

and I'd love to accentuate our little house like this:





and we have to add these wood floors:




and remember this little room, well..............................

wouldn't it look GREAT like this:

I'm excited to enjoy the rest of summer. To try to relax and enjoy (which is one of the most difficult things for me to do) Before we know it, I'll be buying school supplies.....

Summer Weekend

It's funny, on the weekends when I have NO plans, We end up having the most fun.......

Sleeping in for two days past 4am is a little piece of Heaven.

this is my idea of improving on that Heaven one day.....


Friday night catching up on DVR'd shows, and taking mini-cat naps is a perfect end of the week.

Saturday breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast is so much better than the quick bowl of cereal eaten five days a week.


An impromptu Birthday party invite for one of the kids means a quick birthday gift shopping trip in our favorite little down-town.


Catching two wedding parties during the shopping trip was an added bonus...

Dropping the excited kiddo off and meeting up with friends for an impromptu dinner.

A nerve-wracking back seat drive while hubby teaches son to drive and pass a dozen Amish buggies we got behind.



Ice cream dessert at the cutest little place that we are so lucky to live right by.

Movies, gossiping, and enjoying the company of family.

Breakfast for the DAD of the house of bagel sandwiches and coffees, a quick walk through the farmers market, a movie and nap.

Thinking of my own Dad and how very lucky I am to have him in my life.....

A Clean house by 5pm. Dinner as a Family. Discussing summer plans for the week of more parties, more sleepovers, what we would name our future dog and  Ice cream for dessert right before the week begins again.

Perfect, no-plans summer weekend.

How was your's?

Why I will Never Do THAT Again

I promise that I will NEVER:
Drive so close to the back of your car that you can only see my head in your rear view as if I am just looming back there on a broom.

Drive close and honk my horn as if my close driving wasn't giving you a big enough hint.

Flash my lights at you while driving close and honking my car as if you might be blind and deaf, but still managing to drive.

Pass you erratically, while showing you my two longest fingers and then when I get past you, slowing down to your speed abruptly.

I vow not to do these things because:

FOR GOD'S SAKE PEOPLE, MY NEWLY TEMP-LICENSED KID IS DRIVING AND NO,
 I WILL NOT TELL HIM TO SPEED UP BECAUSE YOU ARE LATE FOR WHO-KNOWS-WHERE, IMPATIENT, OR JUST A COMPLETE IDIOT!!

I seriously wanted to get out of my car, walk to the car behind us, open the door and punch the idiots in the face! (this is something my husband actually did do once to an idiot driver - then he called the police and told them what he did)

 Do people just not think or have patience anymore??



and while we are on the topic of NOT doing something ever again:
Applebee's, Ruby Tuesday's,  or any restaurant that can't be bothered to clean their restrooms.

Start driving with no plan or direction, while hungry, thinking we will find a place we can all agree on to eat, and being forced to stop at one of the above places.

Continue to go back to the place that gave you the bad haircut the first time!

Go to the mall out of pure boredom on a rainy Saturday in Winter in the middle of the afternoon with three kids, dragging a hubby, with no real spending money in the wallet.

Go to an amusement park in the middle of summer on the hottest day with the highest humidity at it's most crowded time with three kids and even less money in the wallet after buying the tickets and feeling obligated to stay until closing, wearing the wrong footwear.

Agreeing to an At-Home party of any kind, in MY home.

Driving past a perfectly good gas station, thinking an even better one will most certainly appear soon that has a bathroom while saying "I'm like a camel - I can hold it forever", after drinking Starbucks.

Going to the bathroom in a gas station for any reason whatsoever.

Agreeing to just go and LOOK at the puppies and kittens at the Rescue Village place with three kids, dragging a hubby with no real spending money in the wallet and forgetting that we might want to leave the house one day for more than a few days at a time.



How about you? What would you Never do?

I Would But....

Almost everyday I have a great idea of what I would do, but then I think about the mess/expense/work involved and I change my mind.....

I would buy the hubby a vintage motorcycle like this one:


BUT then I realize the expense, the potential danger and I enjoy our weekend Jeep rides instead:


I would buy a hammock:


But then I shopped for one, and decided it wasn't worth the house payment that it cost,and cleaning off the inevitable bird poop didn't sound fun either (plus I don't have that amazing view)

I would do this on my house:



but I have a feeling the hubby isn't as into this idea as I am.

I would get a puppy, and if I did, it would look like this:




But then I think about adding yet another animal with hair to the house, muddy/snowy paws on the floors and finding an affordable dog sitter/vet and I am content saying "Some Day"......

I would get this:



But then I might regret it later....

I would love to do this in our attic:
 but the ceiling is not nearly that tall, the access is big enough for a three year old to enter, and those tents aren't cheap, but boy would that be cool or what?

I would adore this:
 and these guys:

in my backyard....

But then again................... I would love to glance out the kitchen window to see one of these:



but a backyard with this:

 is pretty amazing too,


I would wear a vintage suit like this:

 but then, I laugh when I consider what it would look like on....


I would so have this parked on my side of the garage:

But then the hubby reminds me of snow/90 degrees and gas mileage.....

I would never complain about laundry again:
 But then someone would dump a week's worth of clothes from under their bed and .......

What would YOU do......

BUT......

Let's Get Physical

At the end of February, on a chilly, snowy day, the hubby and I were running errands when one of our stops landed us in a strip mall  (not a big deal, there is exactly 3 in our area of shopping).  For some strange reason we saw that the space next to where we were was a gym.  We looked at each other, shrugged shoulders and entered.  It only took 15 minutes to sign up for a two person membership.  As we drove home we chatted about how we had to be really serious about using our new membership and no matter what to be consistent.  We made plans and promises and got excited about our 4am week day date.



 4am the old car horn sounding alarm jolts us out of bed and we get up and go.   We go to bed before it gets dark now, but hey, we are going to the gym 4-5 days a week. Every Week.




At 4am there are the same 4-5 people in the gym every time.  We are an eclectic group.  None of us have spoken one single word to the other. We all wear head phones even though there is loud overhead music playing for fear someone were to make a strange noise...... If we have to communicate for some reason, it is a slight movement of the head, a minute gesture or barely visible movement of the mouth.

  This sums us up:

There is a lady/girl (couldn't guess her age for a million dollars) who is a weight lifter.  She wears the same red shorts and tank top every day.  I picture her closet to have at least 5 of the exact same outfits.  She also drives a red car.  She parks in the same spot, uses the same machine for the same amount of time, and is in the gym when we arrive and still there when we leave.  When she is not lifting weights she is on the elliptical.  I hate when she is on the elliptical at the same time as me.  She "ellipes" circles around me.

There is an Asian man who changes his shoes when he arrives as though he is Mr. Rogers.  He is quiet and neat. I only say Asian, because where I live, it is 50% Amish, and 50% non-diverse, so this is an interesting 4am fact. He spends a lot of time with weights and Big Red but she is much more buff than he is.  He drives a PT Cruiser (whenever I see one of these cars I have to say -"it's a PT CREW-SUH".....) Talk Soup anyone?? I digress.....

There are two men that look very much alike and most days I think one is the other and vice versa.  I would say they are retirement age, seem like nice guys in normal life. They never mess with the TV's, log exactly what they do in a file and use the scale every day like really good little gym go-ers..  I can tell they both have lost weight and gained confidence which is a nice thing to watch. Their cars are as nondescript as they are.

Then there is the hubby and I. The minute we arrive we go our separate ways.  I am sure that I am known as the one with bed head who hides in the fish bowl. (There is a room separated by glass where I do body sculpting classes that play on a big screen. )  All by myself. Where I entertain those on the ellipticals.  I really hate the days I wear pants that won't cover by backside.....



The hubby and I often have bad days.  From hitting snooze one too many times, to locking ourselves out of the house, someone always forgets the water and someone (cough, cough) has a hard time walking out of the house without wiping a counter or putting something away causing us to be delayed....

One day we had a really bad day:
We use swipe cards to enter the gym.
I jump out of the car as soon as the hubby pulls in, the car is barely in park, swipe my card and head for the fishbowl.
Hubby brings up the rear, swipes and heads for the weight center to try to get whatever weights he can get away from Big Red.
We do this every day with little to no issues.
Probably around day 15, I swipe, head for the fishbowl.
I do a 35 minute body sculpting class.  It's an especially tough one and I am wiped.
I have about 8 minutes left to do a mile on the ellip-to-kill-me machine.
I get on and start.  Big Red is on my left, two nondescripts on my right.
Half a minute in I am realizing that hubby never walked by the fishbowl and is not on the treadmill which has been our normal pattern.  I can see weights moving out of the corner of my eye, so I assume he is still lifting now that Big Red has left the area.
2 minutes in, I realize no weights are really moving and no one else is in the building except for me, Big Red and the two nondescripts.  This is discovered while I am lacklustering on the elliptical, turning my head every which way.
I am starting to worry.  That doesn't last too long.
Then I get a little pissed -he was done, so he just leaves and goes out to the car???
I can see cars from the windows, but I cannot see inside of them due to the blackness of 4am and reflections of gym equipment.
I am now making my way to the door to leave. I am pretty sure everyone else realized long before I did what happened, but since we don't communicate with each other, trick is on me.

I panic.  I think - OH MY GOD, HE HAD A HEART ATTACK IN THE CAR AND IS IN THE CAR DEAD OR DYING.  I am now in slow motion, leaving the gym, not wanting to discover the grim reality.

I do not know why I thought this about my hubby.  Maybe the time we were waiting for the Dr. to tell us the weird noise he heard when listening to his heart was just a simple heart murmur on the weekend we were moving and I didn't want him to even lift a finger for fear he would collapse, was still niggling my brain.

I am walking towards the car, I can see his head. He is not moving.

THEN he turns his head to GLARE at me.
I'm back to being mad again and I am now in fast-motion.  I wrench open the door and say "Nice, your done working out, so you just come out here??"


He GLARES AT ME HARDER.  He says through severely gritted teeth, "I've been sitting here for 45 minutes.  WATCHING you work out at 4am."


???????????

Long story short - he didn't have his swipe card.  He claims I moved it.  I never looked back when I went into the gym and didn't notice that he never got in. (you can't knock on the door - strict rules and cameras forbid us from opening the door for anyone, otherwise we pay a fine)

He saw me looking around from the elliptical.  He says it took almost 40.6 minutes before I worried.  He could tell by my body language.

We argued the whole way home about the missing card.  I was so mad by the time we pulled into the garage (mostly at myself, but taking it out on him) that I insisted we tear the car apart to prove I didn't touch his card. I screamed -"where did you put it????"  He said right there in the side pocket -

Right there in the side pocket where his card was sitting,

The one he looked for, for 30 minutes before giving up and blaming me.

and I thought he had a heart attack!!

I felt a little odd the next day at the gym.  Kind of like:
"Who does she think she is, making her hubby drop her off and wait in the car???"

Kitchen Nightmares

See that Green Book on top of the bread box?  Well, I had this bright idea on Sunday after laying around in my clean and peaceful house, that I should really do more in the kitchen. (aka I am completley incapable of relaxing so if and when I ever do, I start to *"anx-ide" about what I should be doing) *a Kristen-ism.

 What I am really saying is that I should do more involving FOOD.  In the kitchen.  Like COOK.  Or BAKE.  I have two girls - they really need a role model -That comes from behind a counter and not just a desk who happens to be a really good with a vacuum.  Like the lady on that sign up there.  

So I gathered those two girls and off we went to the Antique Store.  I bought a 1940's edition of The American Women's Cookbook.  I told the girls, the plan is, for them to pick a recipe by Thursday.  Write the shopping list. On Friday, we will shop and Friday night we will become one with the kitchen. Friday night because of the late hour we will for sure be up cooking at.  Let's see how well this one goes.... 

Blogger Fodder comin' up!

Chef #2 is way too excited about this plan.....

I also scored in mint condition a metal cake decorating/frosting/pump thingy-a-ma-bob - so cute, has all the tips and everything.  I'm gonna love using this handy dandy tool. (My Mom is on the floor in complete shock right now while reading this) 

Gonna Make these with that "tool" -
You betcha!

The best part of buying that book (other than the price -$3.00, the SMELL -oh, how I love old-book-smell, and the pictures) was that the previous owner left some of her own recipes in between the pages, a newspaper clipping of movie show times,  and a Christmas Eve Menu written on a little piece of paper:

Gelatin Salad

Assorted Sandwiches

Pickles

Olives

Coffee

Fruitcake

Tuna Salad on White

Buttered Nut Bread

Cream Cheese on Brown Bread

This is a woman after my own heart!! No real cooking involved, and not much of a menu plan! I am going to love using this book that once sat in her kitchen.

I had to pick up a few other things to pretty up my kitchen and get me in "the mood". Like that sweet vintage coffee pot (hard to see but it has a glass lid)

Those gingham aprons for the girls....

These ceramic picnic plates......

My apron is ready and waiting (been hanging there for a month or so from a previous vintage shopping spree) NO, THAT IS NOT A DECORATION...

I'm pretty sure most of our endeavors will be high in fat and calories -based on the sweet tooth of my girls and those darn pictures in that book. Petit Fours here we come!

Free Admission

I relate so much to the scene in the movie Parenthood, when Steve Martin describes life as a roller coaster. 

I feel like I’m either going uphill tentatively and nervously, or downhill thrilled and excited.  I’m either spinning in circles, or upside down.  I’m anxious, elated, scared, asking myself what am I doing, why I did this, or thanking God I’m so lucky.

So I figure I should share the ride with someone – this is what this week’s coaster felt like:

We celebrated Memorial Day at my brother’s who lives in the country.  He has the perfect country house, pool, and yard where there is always some kind of activity going on: dirt biking, shooting guns and the breeze, rhino mudding, swimming, corn hole, pedal-boating in the lake, and so much more.  Between all of that, the amazing food, and great company, it was the perfect start to summer. It was also 90+ degrees.

My Niece graduated from high school.  She is the oldest of my brothers’ and my kids.  I am so proud of her and am so thankful that the younger kids have such an amazing cousin to look up to. 

My daughter graduated from 6^th grade.  High school here starts in 7th grade......

I held a little piece of heaven in the form of a two week old baby.  Not every two week old baby is perfectly chubby with curly hair.  This baby was absolutely perfect in every way.  It has been so long since I held a newborn!  I miss that kind of amazing moment in life when you see how beautiful and perfect life can be.

7 point 5 hours later my own kids called my cell phone SCREAMING that there was a squirrel running loose in the house and mud all over the place.  By the week’s end it was 60 and rainy.  

Turns out the “Squirrel” was a chipmunk.  But he WAS in the house for what seems like a good portion of the day and we have NO IDEA how on earth he got in there.  

I have had no sign of other creatures gaining entry.  I am almost wondering if our two spoiled house-bound kitties opened the door for a little Friday fun.  He was rescued by the turtle saving hubby in perfect condition. (side note: I did see a turtle on my home from work this week and tried to get Super-Turtle-Saverman to come to his rescue, but he said he had to draw the line somewhere.)

In between all of that, I bought shoes and a graduation outfit with the $29 left in the bank account before pay day, was chauffeured (and impressed) by my  temporary driver status son, gathered stuff for a garage sale a neighbor is having next weekend (and spent most of the day being completely annoyed by the fact that in less than 1 year in our new house we have actually accumulated stuff to put into a garage sale) was bummed when an employee told me he was leaving for a different job, was completely pissed when a co-worker showed me the guys face that was eaten off by another guy (he thought it was the funniest thing that although I seem tough, I really cannot handle anything gory WHATSOEVER and it’s going to take me MONTHS to get that image out of my brain!)

It’s funny.  Every single day we have the most mundane to miraculous things happen.  Maybe it’s not always a rollercoaster, some weeks are more like a carnival side show, and some as simple and sweet as a Pony Ride.

Enjoy your coaster and if you need a buddy - I'm glad to come along with.

Endangered Object #335: The House Phone

 I love my cell phone.  We got rid of our house phone because each of us now has a cell phone.  No more telemarketers. No more wrong numbers. No collectors. (Not that I know what those calls would be like or anything –cough, cough)

No more ringing when I am “indisposed”. No more "accidentally" answering the call from someone I don’t want to talk to. ( I would NEVER!)

As a plus, my NEW car is hands-free wired, and when my cell phone jumped into the washer a few months ago, (outdated cell phone suicide) I had to break down and get an iPhone (You can tell I'm a novice - is it I-Phone, iphone, i-phone ???) which I must say really is the best thing since hair color in a box, because let’s face it, sliced bread is OK, but hair color from the grocery store is the bomb (for working Moms on a budget with stubborn greys who has a husband willing to apply it)

I am pretty sure there are some people who have a house phone and one cell phone for the whole house that would be horrified by the ways in which I use said phone:

I text my son all the time.  When he is at home.  In his room. Just a few rooms away from where I am sitting.

 In my defense, his room is upstairs. 

The only other room up those stairs is one other bedroom. The only reason for me to go up those stairs is to have a good yell about the messes, so I avoid that section of the house most days that I want my family to like me.  In my defense, his door is always  shut and the music is louder than my voice can carry.  

Plus, I am tired of going up there and pounding on the door.  Then yelling, and then pushing my way through the door which sticks and squeezing my eyes shut in case I would see something I don't want to see....

So I text him.  He actually thinks this is strange and it has the perfect effect on him. – He comes OUT of his room and joins the family. It's kind of like my way of sending a formal invitation.

I text the hubby romantic promises I have a hard time keeping.  

Can I tell you a little secret? I think about the hubby whenever I am not with him. So I text him what I plan to do or want to do - he responds, and then when it comes down to REAL LIFE – we (me and the mouse in my pocket) are too tired, too busy, too interrupted most of the time, 

so I have resorted to, yes I'm saying it - Sex ting.  (It's pretty PG-13 stuff, I HAVE accidentally included the kids in my messages....)

I send the kids messages of love and encouragement.  I stopped making lunches a long time ago.  On the rare occasion that I do, I always forget to add the little note.  But most days my kids can see a message from me on their phone letting them know I’m thinking of them.  Sometimes it's -

 I love you, hope you have a good day!!

but mostly it's: "If there is a mess when I get home you are so grounded!"

I never call people just to talk…..(where do people find that kind of time??) Unless I’m stuck in traffic, (*hands free) on a long commute, or in a never ending line.  THEN I call my Mom and anyone else I haven’t had time to say Hi to lately who are willing to answer. They feel so special when they get these phone calls from me.  It's like they KNOW I have nothing better to do.... ?

I tease people with silly pictures - this is the cat that refuses to cuddle or associate with any of us.  The other night the girls went to sleepovers and here comes Mr. Anti-Social Pants curling up with the hubby, so of course I had to send it the girls.....

Jealous?

I make plans, then break them.  I grab the phone out of my kids hands and send a text that sounds so much better than what they were going to write.  I keep tabs on where my kids are - 

"You are at Joey's?",

 "OK, then take a picture of you with his Mom."

I program phone numbers I don't ever want to answer with their own ring tone and screen name. Sometimes I have to hide those calls from the kids.....

I've gotten really good at faking static.

Aren't cell phones just the greatest thing since 

A solution to my toasted sandwich issue!!

Vans, Turtles and Family Vacation Plans

BREAKING NEWS!!!
I am no longer a Mom driving a van.  I totally forgot to tell you this exciting bit of news!
As you know, I was never a fan of the Van driving Mom status.
So after 10 years of driving one, I am not anymore.
 
I will tell you that I did feel oddly guilty and sad, leaving the car lot and my Van who kept my family safe for so many years and drove us on many adventures.  This is the not the first time an inanimate object has "spoken" to me.  I had a hard time sleeping that night.  It was weird.....

Unfortunately, our timing is just a little bit off.  We got the new car about a month ago and have decided to drive to Florida in July to see family. I'm already having anxiety about how dirty the new car is going to get (I have kept my new shiny black car IMMACULATE since the day I got it - even if that means vacuuming the interior 2x per day) Hello, my name is Kristen and yes, I DO have OCD.

Our son, the oldest of three we know will be riding in the passenger seat.  There is NO way he will sit THAT close to his little sisters for 24 hours amicably  (on both sides.)  Guess who is riding in the back seat?  Yeah, me.
I am kind of already dreading this part.  I am not very patient when it comes to wiggling, and any type of body noises. (Blame my father!)
We had a discussion about this in the car yesterday while I was sitting in the back seat next to only ONE of the wiggle worms.  The hubby announced he might look into renting a BIG car.  This was said while I was wiping a fingerprint off the ceiling.

I think that is THE BEST IDEA I have heard in a long time! Talk about being able to relax!
I have a feeling that idea is on the "Keep Dreaming" side of the list, but the thought will keep me calm until we leave, in my new shiny black car with me sandwiched in between two wiggle worms, one who thinks farting is still funny and the other who has a tiny little "whistling" noise in her nose.
REMEMBER TO PACK:
                         Headphones
                         Blinders
                         Personal Barricade Wall

Thankfully we won't need a lot of clothes for a trip to FLORIDA in JULY (it's the only time we could get a vacation together - Alaska sounds so much more appealing, but our family chose to live in Florida  -darn it)

The only problem is that our normal "red-neck luggage" consisting of 4 laundry baskets, probably will not fit in the trunk.

 I'm thinking even more red-neck than ever - How about, NO Luggage at all -just fill the trunk up to the top and use that as our family dresser. I'm sure the nice neighborhood we will be visiting won't mind a bit if the hubby and kids change out on the driveway....
 It will be like Cousin Eddy and family coming to town!  (said family does read this blog, so don't be surprised when I blog how my family vacation was cancelled )

of Course, it would be a good excuse to get more of my fave vintage peices....(so much easier to pack!)

We spent some intimate time in the new car last night.  Time that I have a feeling will be the first of many similar events.....  Dropping a pre-teen off at the movie theater, then killing 3 hours driving around town. (where we live the closest theater is 30 minutes away, so you are kind of forced to stay in town hiding from said pre-teen and their friends.)

 Yesterday, unbeknownst to me must have been - Save a Snapping Turtle Day and the hubby took home the Grand Prize trophy for saving the most.  4 in one day!

The last save was while we were "killing time".  This one was a little bit unhappy about his inevitable suicide save, so he had to be rescued by a toe -I took a picture, but I cannot get it to download. Needless to say, the hubby ran across a 4 lane highway, carrying a snappy snapping turtle by his tail to a tall patch of grass on the other side.

I hope you are enjoying your long weekend.  Today is going to be a HOT one here, so I'm dragging out all the card and board games to keep us entertained with....