Sunday, August 28, 2011


Do you ever wonder what you would do if you were just you alone in the world? No hubby, no kids. I do not mean this is what I WANT. I love my life and wouldn’t change it.

Sometimes I just think about what I would do to remind myself that I am an individual as WELL as a Mom, Wife and Co-worker. It’s good to think what I would do without those responsibilities and then maybe I could fit some of that in my life now.

I know people who do exactly that. They train and run in marathons, work and are Moms. They cook, they travel, they adopt abused animals, write books, Climb Mountains, and paint.

I write a blog – whoop-de-doo. The people above do this too, that’s how I know they do all the other stuff. I work full time, I am a Mom and a wife but maybe I should take the individual me out, shake off the dust and start something.

When I drive by any small cottag-y house with a postage stamp yard or even a field of grass, I picture my individual self (from here on out otherwise known as my IS) there. I do not need a lot of space. I need the smallest kitchen ever – I would never cook if it were just me. In this scenario, I run some kind of small home town shop/store/restaurant. Everyone in town knows me. I do all my own repairs, drive an old vintage pick-up truck. I take vacations alone to places like Montana, Maine, Northern California. I have a large dog. I write. I take amazing photographs and I speak French. I wear jeans and t-shirts and vintage dresses. I am tan from riding my vintage bike everywhere I go. I know a thing or two about engines, plumbing, carpentry and even roofing. I am not afraid to get dirty. I have tons of friends and am rarely alone.

When I visit the city, I look at the tall buildings and I see a window into my IS life. I picture myself always in a sharp skirt and heels. I carry a briefcase, the latest in electronics and I have mastered looking cool, calm and collected 24/7. I work non-stop, and am always on the move. My work takes me to Italy, Ireland, New York, and Chicago. My apartment is a walk-up, with a doorman. I do not own a car. I know how to play blackjack, poker, order a drink, hail a cab, and negotiate the lowest pricing on just about anything. I never cry and I never get attached.

Both of my IS appeal to me.

Both are nothing like me right now.

When you drive by a white house in a small town, you might see a girl in capri’s and a hoodie. She drives a Honda Odyssey, works 8 -5 and keeps her house immaculate. She has called off of work as many times as you have fingers since the day she was 15. She has three kids, two cats because her kids were sad and a hubby whom she has known since high school. She reads, she writes, visits with friends when she has time. She skips vacations to pay the bills and has never been overseas. The things she is good at aren’t things you can really be recognized for.

Who is your individual self?


HAA said...

This was the best yet. My IS and yours should have lunch.

The Schweitzers said...

I'm pretty sure that I've seen both of those IS's in movies, so that may be an impossible dream.

My IS has a job working with animals. I come home to a Newfoundland (not that I'd ever give up my dogs). I would have time to travel, I would get together with the "girls" and we would have martini parties. I wouldn't have to worry what I would look like in a bathing suit, because I would be naturally thin and have perfect hair all the time. I think I'd own a Harley.

I could go on and on, but then my post would be a blog! Great subject!!

That gentleman's lady said...

Your IS sounds lovely :)

Mine needs a bit of a think. Perhaps I shall stop by later and add her.

That gentleman's lady said...

My IS would be living in the UK but be free to travel. She is spontaneous. She has time to do everything that she loves in life (ha) - reading, visiting new places, listening to music, spending time with friends, cooking, writing and several other things. She isn't afraid of the "what if" because she knows that life is unpredictable, and that no matter what it will be ok. She smiles a lot. She is serene. She loves people.

Mrs. MidAtlantic said...

My IS would have internet, for sure, but NO TV. I have thought this for years, but now I am sure of it. I'd bake more and read more and sew more, and maybe even clean more without the time-sucking distraction of the TV!

Stephanie in Suburbia said...

LOVE this! I mean, I love my husband and baby, I say I can't imagine life without them. But...I can. I can imagine it, and I often do. I imagine what it would be like to just be able to go out when I feel like it. I want to be able to sleep in when I feel like it. I want to be able to plan a weekend away, or even a day at the gym, without having to find someone whose timing works out with mine to take care of my kid. I wouldn't trade it, but a girl can dream. A girl can dream.

Amy Cappelli said...

I read this when you posted it but due to demanding children I didn't get a chance to comment until now. This is such a wonderful post. Like you- I love my family and my life. But, sometimes I feel the pinch of guilt for imagining a different life- where I am a different me with different circumstances.

Btw, I nominated your blog for the Parents Best All Around Mom blog on the Parents site. I think you are as deserving (if not more) than any of the blogs listed :-)