This is where I REALLY tell you how I am one post at a time.
You pretend to care. I feel like someone is listening. It's all good.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
I let the messes the kids make bother me way too much – I know this because last night at 11:30pm, I jumped out of bed in aggravation and cleaned the basement for 20 minutes before I realized I might be crazy.
The real reason I jumped out of bed at 11:30pm last night was because I was mad about something not related to the mess in the basement. (I should also say that I am the only one who views it as a mess, everyone else in the house calls it having some things out) I had told my son to work on his school project over the weekend instead of the night before it is due but wouldn’t you know, he was still up working on it when I got into bed last night. I stayed in bed about 5 minutes until my blood started to boil because I was right and he didn’t listen to me. I proceeded to slam my feet down the hallway into the basement to reprimand him (would you call screaming and pointing my finger reprimanding? No?) Then I started cleaning (in a frenzied/crazy manner) until he was done with his project.
What made me most mad is that he had called my husband earlier to ask if he could run across the street to a school event. My husband said OK, despite me in the background saying no, he has a project due tomorrow and I do not think it is done. I was ignored. Neither of them saw anything wrong with a late night to get the project done. As a matter of fact, they both looked at me as though I WAS THE CRAZY PERSON! Which infuriated me more and so I screamed and slammed louder.
My younger two were sleeping (or trying to) while I was having a baby pants temper tantrum.
My son gets straight A’s and doesn’t get into trouble. He is just a teenager who thinks I am a crazy person because he doesn’t let anything get him upset. EVER. Even when I am yelling at him in my PJ’s (the ones with the snowmen on them) at 11:45pm waking the whole house up.
I then turned my anger on the two cats who were sitting there looking at me like a crazy person, so I yelled at them to get into the basement (where they go at night) like they need to go to bed too.
Is it possible I have already been punished for my irrational actions by not getting any sleep last night, and my husband not speaking to me? Or do I have more coming to me?
Sometimes I am such a loser! I know when I am in the middle of doing something like this, how ridiculous I:
1. Look (wagging my finger, wearing nice-mom pj’s, spit flying out of my mouth, nasty snarl on my face, stomping my BARE feet on the ground like it will make a difference.)
2. Sound (I throw out big Mom words and a few slurs and a swear word or two to make me sound so mean and tough)
3. AM (just plain RIDICULOUS!!!)
I am hoping by this post, someone out there can relate, maybe we can start a Loser Mom club, or IRATE LOSER Moms, or RIDICULOUSLY IRATE LOSER MOMS club. But we’d have like no other members; it would just be the two of us and our snowman pant pj’s, all lonely and loserish. Please don’t hate me, I figured I should let you know –I’m not perfect. As if you hadn’t already figured that one out from my previous posts. But I AM honest! I’ll be an angel tonight. I will kiss the hubby, tell him I am sorry, kiss my son, kiss the girls, ply them with a yummy treat, and not say the words CLEAN UP for 24 hours.(the last part being the hardest from an OCD freak w/ frequent bad Mom moments.)
I bet my son did this when I wasn't looking after he was born.